How to create influence

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In order to make progress in life, be it your professional or personal endeavours, you will need to get things done. In order to do this, you will need the help of other people. Some of these people will be very busy. Others may not know you that well. To get people to support you, you will need to influence them to take certain likes of action.

Below are tips are on how you can build influence:

Help others when they ask

Always have an attitude of being willing to help people. When people request help and you’re in a position to do so, help them. When you do something for someone or do them a favour, the other person will naturally feel like wanting to reciprocate.

When your time comes and you want to do something, you can call upon people you have helped previously to assist you, as they will be more willing to do so.

Be likable

When you’re friendly and cheerful, you’re happy. When you’re happy it helps spread happiness to people you’re interacting with. It rubs off on them. If people like you and enjoy being around you because of the positive vibes you give off, they will be more willing to help you when you need assistance.

Actively listen to people

We were given two ears and one mouth for a reason. However, we can forget this at times. Active listening means genuinely listening to other people when they talk with you. This means allowing them to finish first before speaking and asking them questions, which shows interest and concern in what they’re saying.

Compliment people when they have earned it

People like to hear good things about themselves. When people have done something you admire, give them a genuine compliment telling them so. What’s important is you also tell the person, what in particular you liked about what they did. This type of compliment will carry more meaning.

Build connections

The greater your network of contacts, the bigger your influence, as you have a wide number of people you can call upon. Once you begin to network, you need to work on developing these relationships, through making effort to get to know them, meeting up with them and helping them out.

Ask for help

A good way to create influence is to ask for help when you need it from those who are in authority and already have influence themselves. People in general like to help and by asking those in authority, it will help to reinforce their sense of their own authority and power while giving you what you need in the process.

Borrow influence of others

You can also partner yourself up with people who are already in influential positions. By doing this, your perceived influence in the eyes of others will increase and your leeway to carry out certain actions will increase.

Build trust

All the points previously in this post contribute to making you someone other people can trust, which is the most important factor when it comes to creating influence. If people trust you, then they will be more willing to help you.

My friends, it’s over to you:

  • What other tips can you share to help us build our influence?
  • What are your opinions on the area of influence?
  • Please share your valuable views, thoughts and experiences in the comments box below.
  • Please also share this post on your favourite social networks.
24 Comments
  1. Hi Hiten,

    Great topic. I find myself in a position where I need to apply all you have written. As someone who created and and am running Kings Speakers Toastmasters club for stammerers I fell into the trap of doing it all myself. This led to being worn down, and stressed. So I created a committee and have a great team helping me out.

    However, delegation doesn’t come easy. Even with being nice, and helpful, and supportive there will always
    be someone in the team who simply doesn’t have the motivation or drive to want to help. I’m finding that now.

    So, I’d add another point to your list – recognise other people’s desire and motivation levels, and when someone in the team isn’t performing, then deal with it early in a diplomatic and empathetic manner. Otherwise the problem grows and grows and created ill-feeling.

    Cheers

    Harry

    1. Hi Harry,

      I’m really glad you liked the topic. Influence is one topic, which really fascinates me.

      Many thanks for sharing your experiences with leading the creating and running of Kings Speakers Toastmasters Club.

      The additional point you added was excellent. As you said, being friendly is very important. However, understanding the motivations and desires of those who will are trying to influence is critical.

      We have to make effort to meet each person we want to bring onto our team at an individual level, establish what makes them tick and ensure they get their own outcomes in the process we are undertaking.

      Thanks so much for adding more to this post, Harry.

  2. Hiten, you’ve touched upon a topic that is very important in our daily life. In general, I believe that being true to others and being a good human beings pays off – this includes doing everything that you’ve mentioned.

    Follow the golden rule – treat others as you’d want them to treat you. To influence people, you should treat them as important. True acts of kindness truly win hearts. To influence people, you win their trust and make a place in their hearts.

    To influence is to impress. Besides the general human qualities and nature, different people get influenced by different things. You need to do something that they regard as good and important – so if you want to influence a certain person, you can also find out about his or her liking and values – mold yourself accordingly. If you’re good in something of my interest, you’ll influence me and I’ll be impressed! 🙂

    1. Hi Harleena,

      Indeed as you said, being a good human being pays off in the end. One can create a lot of influence for themselves just by demonstrating good human qualities.

      I loved what you wrote in your comment and agree with what you said. Treating people as being important really can help us in influencing them as can impressing them. Presenting ourselves as doing something, which other people value can make us seem like we are like those individuals. As you said, this will impress them and also increase our ability to influence them.

      Thanks very much for adding your excellent insights to this post. I much appreciate it. 🙂

  3. Hi Hiten,

    Excellent topic choice, mate! There is really very little more to be added; you’ve done a splendid job listing what is needed to be influential.

    Being trustworthy is a huge part of being a influence in the lives of others. If people feel they can trust you, they will be more than willing to stand with you when needed. Supporting and encouraging one another, or as I like to call it, “Sharpening” one another; is an essential part of that influence as well. We cannot allow ourselves to begin thinking that we can do anything alone. We were created to need other human reaction. When we are willing to give more than we receive, we will begin seeing the importance of being influential.

    In the beginning of the year, I wrote a post that explained why I was choosing influence over popularity. I went on to say how in the beginning I thought “the numbers” were more important. Over the last couple of years, I am not focused on the numbers anymore. It has become more important to me to impact the lives of others in a more positive way. I feel that being an example for others is the greatest impact and legacy we can offer. By leaving a positive impression on the minds of others, we feel better about ourselves and begin to build our confidence in whatever area it is needed most.

    I am incredibly grateful for those, you included, that I’ve been able to connect with who have been incredibly influential in the direction my life has taken. When we surround ourselves with people who care about being influential, we can’t help but to want for our lives and vocation to be an influence too.

    Well done, my friend. Thanks for sharing this with us.

    1. Hi Deone,

      What a wonderful comment, my friend! It was a like a mini-post with nuggets of great advice.

      As you say, being trustworthy is so important. And we gain people’s trust by what we say and more importantly I believe, by what we do. I guess the saying ‘actions speak louder’ than words comes into play.

      You’re spot on about not falling into the trap of believing we can do it alone. There will be some things and perhaps many things we can do by ourselves. However, we will definitely need the assistance of other people at some point.

      The point you made about be willing to give more than we receive is very powerful. I can totally see how this can create massive amounts of influence.

      Indeed, I can appreciate your focus in impacting the lives of others in a positive way. This is probably one of the greatest things we can do for other people and for this we need to be able to influence them.

      The same goes for me, mate. I’m truly grateful to have connected with you, as you have supported me to continue the journey. I understand what you mean about surrounding ourselves with likeminded people. When we surround ourselves with people who consciously bring areas like influence to light, it inspires and attracts us who have similar interests to that particular light and explore how we too can impact others in a positive and empowering way.

      Thanks very much Deone for dropping by and leaving your brilliant comment!

  4. Hi Hiten,

    Nice thought, How to creat a great impact on others, depend on how u interact, how u react, how u behave. As i think building links, praising the efforts of others, proper interaction, always be helpfull helps in leave a good influence.
    I always try to influencing others in a positive way but i don’t know, i hv been succeed or not. But this topic upto a limit leads to your life because as per me u get able to leave a great influence on everoyone whom u interact including me.

    1. Hi Rupali,

      You added some great insights to this post. Thank you.

      As you say, making proper connections, telling others when they have done well and generally being a good person when interacting with people, helps us to influence.

      I think one way we can tell if we have been successfully at influencing others, is to see how they have responding to the way we are communicating and behaving. If they respond in the way we wanted them to, then this is a sign that we’ve been successful.

      Thanks a lot for sharing your views on this topic and for showing your support. I much appreciate it.

  5. Hiten,
    Thanks for your sharing about influence, how to influence other people is a very important topic. And easy to say, but difficult to have. There are some other people also want to build up their influence at the same time, and they would also try to reduce your influence by different measure. I always surround by such people, do you have any ideas can help me to get alone with them.

    1. Hi Waiwa,

      It’s great to connect with you. Thanks for your comment.

      I agree depending on the type of environment we are wishing to gain influence in, there will be other people who may attempt to reduce your influence.

      Regarding your asking for ideas, do you mean ideas to get in an environment where you are alone with such people who are also trying to build their influence, or do you mean ideas on how to get along with those people, so you develop rapport with them?

      If you could clarify what you mean, I can better share my thoughts with you.

      Thank you.

  6. Great ways to begin or increase influence. Influence is an essential factor to being successful. I think serving, caring, and adding value to people will increase our influence. When people know how much we care they will want to follow us and be involved in what we are doing.

    1. Hi Dan,

      I’m really glad you appreciated the points in the post. You added some great additional tips in your comment.

      I totally agree with you, my friend. An overarching attitude of service and care can help us increase our influence in a huge way. Indeed, this can act as a huge attractor to people to find out more about what we have to say.

      Thanks very much for your brilliant comment, Dan.

  7. Hey Hiten – I think there’s nothing better than listening. Some of the world’s most influential people listen a lot. We just happen to see them when the talk A LOT! haha in addition to listening, I think you can take it a step further and say behind present with others is a great way to to gain the friendship and respect of another person. Most of the time we are thinking about ourselves and other things. If we thought about the other person and only them while talking to them, we will appreciate them more and gain their respect more.

    I work in the political world with a lot of very influential people so have seen all the tips you used in action at the highest levels of government and politics. You’ve hit all the major points! And one can never go wrong with Harleena’s suggestions about treating others the way you’d like to be treated.

    1. Hi Hiten,

      Its so lovely to see you coming up with a wonderful topic and as Vishnu said workable as well.

      One more thing which I wanted to add is the fact that you see in others what you have inside you. So before asking someone to trust you first you need to trust them.

      Sincerely,
      Rafi

      1. Hi Rafi,

        I’m really glad you enjoyed the topic!

        I loved your tip. Indeed, it’s important that we trust the person who we want to trust us. Worthwhile relationships, which are win-win for everyone, are based on mutual trust.

        Thanks very much for contributing to this post.

    2. Hi Vishnu,

      Your comment was absolutely brilliant and what you wrote about the world’s most influential people bring excellent listeners is so true. Of course as you say, we usually only see such people when they are yapping a way a lot!

      I know one entrepreneur who talks a lot. However, he is the best listener I have ever known. Indeed as you say, being present with people when we talk with them is a great thing to do. I can always tell when someone is present with me because their responses truly reflect what I’ve just them.

      You’re spot on. A lot of the time, we’re not really listening. In conversation, our minds drift and we’re thinking ahead about how we’re going to respond. I think it was the late Princess Diana who had an amazing skill of just locking her attention on the person she was talking with at various engagements. Other people would walk past. However, she never allowed herself to get distracted from the person she was talking with.

      I can totally appreciate, how your work brings you very close with individuals playing the influence game, at the highest level. I guess in the political world, being influential is a key aspect that many people seek to be.

      Thanks for leaving such a brilliant comment, Vishnu.

  8. HI Hiten,

    Everyone here has added so much to the topic that I don’t feel like writing down the same points in anyway will be a value addition.

    But I’ll take the discussion to something not touched in the comments-

    Don’t you think, at times we get influenced by the big people around and there is no denying the fact, if someone who is more richer or has got more authority than us, we more or less get influenced by his sayings and words even at times they don’t command such respect if they aren’t wearing that richie rich or authority tag.

    At times it becomes a herd mentality and I’ve seen people defying all the logic and get so influenced.I feel whether they are influenced or get swayed away.

    The one who create the havoc through the terror activities have got influenced by their seniors who really are the mastermind behind all the destructive activities.

    Now coming to second aspect: I’ve seen people get influenced by the charismatic personality, if one has that sort of quality he can for sure influence many people around. In organization do you think Leaders creates the trust factor with every employee, no, but they are are the position of authority and then can influence anyone. Here the catch is have they build the trust first or they have that magnetic personality?

    But the points which you have put across so very well define the critical elements of creating the influence and I really thank you for such a lovely discussion.

    Sapna

    1. Hi Sapna,

      Many thanks for writing such an amazing comment and for adding your thoughts for further discussion and consideration.

      Regarding your first point, I’m totally with you on this. There is a tendency to get influenced by those who are in authority, richer, famous etc. I think we all do from time to time (me included). It really is fascinating when this happens and probably a number of reasons why. My own personal view is that we end up getting influenced by such people because they are demonstrating, perhaps a type of behaviour or a reputation for doing something, which we value as being important.

      About your second point, charisma definitely has a big part in influence and we will get influenced by those who we believe as being charismatic. Regarding this issue of charisma, my take on it is, what is charismatic and what isn’t is subjective. If I find a quality in a leader, which I admire then I will find him/her charismatic. This same quality might be something, which another person wouldn’t appreciate.

      In an organisation, a leader (I’m talking CEO, MD) by their very position will have influence. However, I reckon their true followers will be those who they have also created trust with. Of course, if the company is very big, then perhaps the leader is not able to create trust with each person on an individual basis. In this case, perhaps followers will follow without ever truly trusting the leader and doing so because they have to. Of course, there are various approaches the leader can take to reach out to all the followers, if he/she really wants to make the effort to do so.

      Your point about magnetic personality got me thinking too. In my view, someone with a magnetic personality would be someone who I would be able to trust because I would expect them to be effective at creating trust.

      I’m really glad you’re enjoying the discussion and thank you very much for adding your excellent contributions to the post.

  9. Hello Hiten, very nice article and well presented for sure.
    I think we can all relate to this in some form or other. Doing what we do on the internet we influence people every day in some way just by people stopping by and reading our blogs.

    Having the support of others will go a long way and hopefully and allow us to also meet people that we can count on if we ever need help in the days to come with anything.

    Thanks so much for a great ready my friend it’s always a pleasure.

    1. Hi Rob,

      I’m really glad you enjoyed the article, my friend.

      What you wrote in your comment is so true. Through our blogs we’re influencing our readers and each other every day. Blogs really are a powerful tool to help us to influence. I’ve met some great people online such as you, to build a support network who I can call upon for help.

      Thanks for leaving your great comment.

  10. Sometimes you can offer help when you see that someone is having a hard time asking for it.

    Great list. I especially liked the ask for help idea. We don’t think of that as being something that would increase our own influence, but I’ve discovered that people are often glad to help and are pleased to be asked.

    1. Hi Galen,

      Absolutely, if a person is finding it difficult to ask for help, we can certainly take the initiative and offer to help. Many thanks for adding this point to the discussion.

      I’m really glad you liked the list and could appreciate the point about asking for help, in particular. Indeed, the experience of helping can be enjoyable for people. By being conscious of this, we can ask people for help and if they are in an influential position, the help they can offer us can potentially make a big difference for us.

      Many thanks for leaving your comment. I really appreciate it.

  11. Hi Hiten,

    Influence is so important! I’m just starting to really realize how much so. I agree with all of your tips, and I would have to add, don’t be selfish.

    I have an example of why. I really liked this one woman and thought she was a great blogger. I was starting to connect with her, and felt like it was going to be a good relationship, but soon I realized that she was all about herself and not other people. Even though she was great at make you feel good for visiting her site, she never returned the favor. She was really about her – and I quickly started to lose respect for her and our relationship ended. Too bad, because I felt like we could have benefited each other in some way.

    I guess that really just boils down to building trust. Like you said, it is so important when trying to influence other people to respect you and want to interact with you on a positive level.

    1. Hi Kari,

      Thanks so much for leaving your great comment!

      I totally agree with what you said about not being selfish. Influence when created and used properly should be mutually beneficial. Otherwise it is just like the blogger you know who always took without returning.

      Indeed, if people trust us, then we can more easily influence them, as they will want to get to know us.

      Thanks very much for adding so much more to this post.

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