It’s difficult to stop a mind-set that’s controlled you throughout your career as a person who stutters.
It may feel totally unnatural to you to go against every muscle in your body.
You can’t just suddenly shout from the rough tops, “Hey, look at me, from this day forward I will be optimistic. I will be a confident speaker.” It takes time to shift an existing mind-set. It happens after repeated action.
Take small baby steps, one at a time and increase your confidence in speaking, and doing the things you’ve been hesitant to do.